Well, the kids are gone (temporarily). Drew is far gone ... he's been in Argentina since last August (and won't be back 'til next August) with a side trip to Northern Ireland for 2.5 months. We've cobbled together a "system" of communication using e-mail, Skype (when he's in Argentina) and calling card (viva cheap cards for South America). Just haven't figured a way to sip a beer or go to a basketball game via online communications, alas.
(There are two things I miss most: being able to spontaneously call and grab a beer or bite to eat with him or be able to watch the teams he coaches play basketball.)
This week Matt (and Molly) join Drew and Meghan in Buenos Aires. So the mid-kid is out of country as well -- but not out of mind. Barb visibly pales when I start talking NCAA tournament stuff and i find that others strangely aren't available when I drop in at the office or call. Hmmmmmm.
(Poor Roy got stuck for ten minutes the other night when I called to [briefly] commiserate with him over the loss of Southern Illinois -- in the first round and who I picked to win in that first game and thus upsetting my bracketology but who's holding a grudge. Wait a minute, I digress -- and take this too seriously. Anyway, I commiserated with him and then proceeded to bore him stiff with my NCAA talk. Ouch -- sorry, bro!)
And this weekend, young Alec took off for a weekend of fun and frivolity in Little Falls. That's the home of Ms. Angela -- Alec's "companion" last summer and a true friend of Alec and his gang. Tricia -- Alec's very good friend -- was also invited (or Tricia was invited and Alec got to go along -- depends on who you ask first). Tricia's a bit like Barb -- she packed a large bag of snacks, items to work on whilst driving, books, notebooks, etc. Poor Alec was consigned to the back seat, sharing space with two suitcases, a few textbooks, said "car bag" plus his "car bag" and a pretty white cat who is deaf and hopefully not afflicted with motion sickneess.
As a result, Barb and I had this house all to ourselves. Our very own adult (most of the time at least) selves. The novelty was fun. We luxuriated in having the house to ourselves.
But. It's quiet. Very, very quiet.
Now, Alec doesn't make a lot of noise and he's pretty good at keeping himself entertained for hours on end. But he's a roamer ... and a snacker ... and a checker-outer-of-things. So, even though one or two words from him is a lengthy fillibuster -- or the equivalent of a short speech from Robert Byrd (D-WVa) -- you kind of miss that muttered "fine" when you ask him how things are going.
There's not the background noise of the x-box when you walk by his room. There's not the "self-talking" in the bathroom as he prepares for bed and rehashes all that went on in his day -- or should have gone on in his mind. There's not the clatter of cabinet doors, refrigerator, bowl and spoon etc as he makes a bowl of cereal.
It's quiet. Kind of nice. But sort of empty.
In a few hours, Alec will return. In a few days, Matt will return. In a few months, Drew will return. God, time can move so slowly. But it sure moved in quick-step as they grew up.
Sunday, March 19, 2006
Wednesday, March 08, 2006
More Birthday Pictures
As more pictures are received from Ardyce's Birthday Party, I'll add 'em to this page.
From Jim Horner (03/08/06)
Here's the family (well most of those who were there). From left to right. Seated: Pam (Jim's wife), Hilda (roommate) and Ardyce. Standing: Jeff, Jim, Roy, Alec (in front of Roy) Sean, Rick, Judy (Bob's wife), Barb, Dave, Burke and Bob. Sean and Jeff are Bob & Judy's sons. Alec is Rick & Barb's son.
Below are Ardyce and her Six Sons. Seated next to Ardyce is Roy. Standing (left to right) are Jim, Rick, David, Burke and Bob. We're a handsome group and Ardyce is due a lot of credit ... she helped dress us all at one time or another!
From Jim Horner (03/08/06)
Here's the family (well most of those who were there). From left to right. Seated: Pam (Jim's wife), Hilda (roommate) and Ardyce. Standing: Jeff, Jim, Roy, Alec (in front of Roy) Sean, Rick, Judy (Bob's wife), Barb, Dave, Burke and Bob. Sean and Jeff are Bob & Judy's sons. Alec is Rick & Barb's son.
Below are Ardyce and her Six Sons. Seated next to Ardyce is Roy. Standing (left to right) are Jim, Rick, David, Burke and Bob. We're a handsome group and Ardyce is due a lot of credit ... she helped dress us all at one time or another!
the "immediate family"
There are some pictures of Alec in a few other entries (and more to come). But I realized I didn't really have any of the other two boys or of Barb. So, to remedy this:
this is the "family" and significant others. From left to right:
Matt, Molly Miller, Megan Powers, Drew, Alec and Barb
Matt is a first year law school student (University of St Thomas);
Molly is a senior at St Thomas;
Megan is working on her Masters under a Rotary Fellowship at the University of Salvador in Buenos Aires Argentina. From 1/06 through mid-March, she and Drew are in Coleraine Northern Ireland working on her internship. They return to BA in mid March and were in the US over Christmas.
Drew is a teacher and freshman coach at Cretin-Derham Hall High School. Right now he's on a one-year leave and teaching part-time in BA
Alec is in his second of three years at Career Life Transition, a program through our local school district. He's also active in Special Olympics, and works at Old Chicago restaurant.
Barb is a Senior Attorney and supervising attorney with the Hennepin County Public Defenders Office.
And here's a picture of the four Mons Men:
this is the "family" and significant others. From left to right:
Matt, Molly Miller, Megan Powers, Drew, Alec and Barb
Matt is a first year law school student (University of St Thomas);
Molly is a senior at St Thomas;
Megan is working on her Masters under a Rotary Fellowship at the University of Salvador in Buenos Aires Argentina. From 1/06 through mid-March, she and Drew are in Coleraine Northern Ireland working on her internship. They return to BA in mid March and were in the US over Christmas.
Drew is a teacher and freshman coach at Cretin-Derham Hall High School. Right now he's on a one-year leave and teaching part-time in BA
Alec is in his second of three years at Career Life Transition, a program through our local school district. He's also active in Special Olympics, and works at Old Chicago restaurant.
Barb is a Senior Attorney and supervising attorney with the Hennepin County Public Defenders Office.
And here's a picture of the four Mons Men:
03/05 - Happy 90th Birthday Ardyce!
My stepmother, Ardyce Gilna Horner Mons, turned 90 this past Sunday. Ardyce has six sons: four are "biological" -- Jim, Burke, Bob and Dave. My brother Roy and I are the "inherited" sons from her second marriage to my dad. (Dad and Ardyce started dating when I was a Junior in college and Roy a junior in high school. Three years later they were married.) All of her sons attended as did many daughters-in-law and family.
Ardyce suffers from Multiple System Atrophy -- a progressive and degenerative disease which is somewhat similar to Parkinsons. She's in a nursing home and her oldest son, Jim Horner (along with his wife, Pam), has done a spectacular job of coordinating care, etc. Another son, Bob and his wife, Judy, also live in the area and spend a fair amount of time with her.
Alec, Barb and I visited her last summer and at that time Ardyce was admitted to hospice care. (Typically hospice care is offered only when the physician and staff believe that end of life is near -- generally within six months -- and is intended to help the patient manage care in a palliative mode rather than treatment.) We thought we had said our goodbyes.
But we hadn't ... we had a second chance!
A few weeks ago, Jim called and told me that the four Horner brothers were planning on attending her birthday and he suggested we might want to attend as well. (Apparently when Jim told Ardyce that the four Horners were going to be there, she pointedly asked "And what about my other sons?" You can't refuse an invitation like that!!)
Visiting Ardyce last summer, we had all noticed how tired she became and how difficult it was for her to converse. So we were a bit apprehensive ... that was exacerbated by a couple of phone calls I'd made after the holidays when she wasn't really able to talk over the phone.
However, she truly was energized by the event.
We visited her Saturday morning and she seemed to be doing okay. Not great but okay. We had a brief visit since we didn't want to wear her out before the party.
When we came in for the party Sunday, we were amazed. She had a nice outfit on, her hair had been styled (kudos to the staff who did it!!) and she was bright-eyed and very talkative.
The event started a bit before 1:00 and ran for a bit more than three hours. During that time, she heard toasts, a few short remarks from her sons and family, received phone calls from many of her grandchildren, relatives, and friends. Through it all she stayed alert and cracked a few jokes plus delivered a few verbal elbow jabs!
It was truly a wonderful, affirming and amazing party! I'm sure glad that my dad persisted in proposing until he wore her down! She's given us a lot before this but we truly received a gift of how to live a life on that Sunday!
Here's some photos that I took. Others were much better in getting snap shots so I'll probably add some later on. But if you would like a photo, feel free to right click on the images and download it. If you'd instead like a larger photo with higher resolution, let me know and I'll e-mail them to you. (Most of the original photos are 8x10s and at 300dpi resolution) I also have a couple of brief videos from the party ... let me know if you'd like me to e-mail them to you.
(above) My brother, Roy, with Ardyce as he tries to explain another escapade!
(below) Our son, Alec, with Grandma! Alec also loved getting to meet two new uncles and having five uncles around to talk to.
(below) Ardyce and Hilda, her friend and roommate. Ardyce has had several roommates but the relationships have been fairly poor. She and Hilda get along very well and Hilda spends a lot of time encouraging Ardyce. We really appreciate her assistance and good cheer!
Tuesday, March 07, 2006
Ardyce's 90th Birthday - the backstory
Barb, Alec and I drove out to Colorado to celebrate Ardyce's (my step-mother's) 90th Birthday. Here is a brief account of our trip and some photos. The story of the party and photos are in a separate entry that precedes this one.
Thursday and Friday
We made the trip out in two days ... first day to Lincoln NE and arrived in Denver around 3PM on Friday. I'd talked to Roy about picking him up from the airport; his flight was due in at 3 and through a stroke of part genius, part planning and mostly luck we arrived at 3:10. Met him at the arrival level and off we went to the Holiday Inn at Wheat Ridge.
After checking in, we headed to downtown Denver. Alec spotted an ESPN Zone restaurant and wanted to go in. While there, we saw that the Missouri Valley Conference tournament with Southern Illinois (Roy's alma mater) on one of the 20 different "feeds" in the main dining area. So, we quickly glommed onto a booth with our own private TV screen and cheered for the Salukis. We got to see the complete second half & they won. This technology is pretty neat.
Following dinner we strolled to The Tattered Cover bookstore and I think everyone bought at least one book. I found Strunk & White's Elements of Style with illustrations and in hardbound (a great resource for us would-be writers).
Later, we got in touch with Dave and Burke Horner. We decided to meet for some drinks and Burke asked me to pick the place. I quickly consulted the GPS to see what was close to us and selected (drum roll please) The Sports Page Saloon, figuring it would be some sort of sports bar. Well ... we'll let the pictures tell part of the story:
Now I'm not sure what the "Pauz Inn" sign is all about but there was no sign announcing the Sports News Saloon. At least Burke was able to locate it. Actually, it looks much better in the pictures than in person. In person, it was a smoky somewhat run-down bar with a decided country-western flavor, lots of second-hand smoke and about 10 very sad-looking customers who were even sadder-sounding when they sang karaoke.
But it wasn't the venue -- it was the company!!
David and I had last seen each other several years ago while we were starting out on vacation and he & family were completing their vacation. We met accidentally at a, um, rest stop. While we were, uh, standing next to each other. Now normally "guy etiquette isn't to look either right or left but just ahead. I did glance right and lo and behold there was David!
This meeting, however, was much more conventional.
Burke and I hadn't seen each other in about 28.5 years ... I remember that Drew was 6 months old and we were visiting Dad and Ardyce during the summer while Burke, Sue and their family (at least Lisa and maybe Devon) were also visiting.
We had a great time although Burke may have bought a round of drinks (or more) for the bar when the waitress held his credit card hostage.
Saturday
That morning we paid a short visit to Ardyce and talked to her about the party for the next day. She seemed a bit tired (she'd had a number of visits from Burke, David, etc) but very excited about the party the next day.
That afternoon we visited Boulder (a few miles north and west of where we were staying and where Jim and Pam had taken us when we visited last summer. Walked around and bought a book or two plus took a drive up the Front Range into Nederland. I was a bit bothered by the altitude so I stayed in the car while Roy, Barb & Alec walked to the waterfall.
Here's a photo of Nederland and of the waterfall (neither of which I took but grabbed via the 'net).
Saturday night, all six brothers and families got together at a restaurant entitled "Chicago" and featuring Italian beef sandwiches, Jays Potato Chips and Green Rivers. Some non-Chicagoan infidels had gyros, bbq sandwiches etc but it was pretty authentic Chicago grub. Kudos to Bob and Jim who had scouted it out. And if any of us die of cholesterol-laden arteries, sue Burke who paid for the meal. (Thanks Burke!)
After dinner, we went to Bob and Judy's new home and watched a video that Jim had made with Ardyce. Ardyce described some of her family's history, how they got to Hastings NE, growing up in Hastings and her meeting Bill Horner. It was very interesting and Jim believes he has several other tapes for us to hear as well.
Sunday
The big day. We started it early and had breakfast with Jim and Pam and then went to their church (Cherry Creek Presbyterian). That is one large church! Made our church feel puny in comparison and Roy said his church is even smaller than ours. It was a great time to share with Jim and Pam and we appreciated their including us.
After church, Jim and Pam headed over to set up the party and we did a bit of sight-seeing in the neighborhoods around Denver. Denver is clearly a western city but there's some striking similarities with Minneapolis and St Paul as some of the housing was built in the same period as ours.
I'll upload pictures and give a description of the party in a separate entry ... it precedes this so you may have already seen it.
After the party, Roy, Alec Barb and I unwound with a glass of wine and then went back to downtown Denver.
We had dinner at Marlow's (I think I've been there every time when in Denver -- great food and great Manhattans) and spun memories. It's always great to see Roy and re-establish our connections. Poor Alec and Barb probably got bored just as they did last summer and again at Thanksgiving. But Roy and I find ourselves just, well, fascinating!!
Monday
Roy left for his 6:30 AM flight around 5:00 on the shuttle. Fortunately he demurred when I offered to drive him ... come to think of it, I didn't make the offer more than once and not very strongly at that. (Kind of like "well, I guess you wouldn't want me to drive you if I had to get up that early, right? Huh, right?")
We took off for Omaha. As we were driving, Barb idly said "gee, we're not that far from Hastings (Ardyce's home town)" Then she said, "gee, it would be nice to take some pictures of her old home there." Then she said, "you know, I don't think it's that far off the Interstate after all." I got the hint.
So, we started off and located Ardyce's old home: 1819 W 3rd Street, Hastings NE.
The siding has been updated and there's probably a few other updates but as you look up and down the street, it's not too hard to envision how it looked in the 1920s and 30s when Ardyce's family lived there. It's about six blocks from the business district and a block from a major east-west street where we suspect the buses ran that took Ardyce back and forth to the college.
So, it was off to the college to take some additional photos:
We finally straggled into Omaha around 7:30 at night. I was bushed, Barb was tired and Alec was all set to go swimming. (his one and only swimming event of the entire trip ... much to his chagrin)
Tuesday
Because we had made such a long drive on Monday, Tuesday was pretty easy. We left at a leisurely 10 AM and made it home before 5PM. In all, over 2100 miles and a lot of great memories.
Thursday and Friday
We made the trip out in two days ... first day to Lincoln NE and arrived in Denver around 3PM on Friday. I'd talked to Roy about picking him up from the airport; his flight was due in at 3 and through a stroke of part genius, part planning and mostly luck we arrived at 3:10. Met him at the arrival level and off we went to the Holiday Inn at Wheat Ridge.
After checking in, we headed to downtown Denver. Alec spotted an ESPN Zone restaurant and wanted to go in. While there, we saw that the Missouri Valley Conference tournament with Southern Illinois (Roy's alma mater) on one of the 20 different "feeds" in the main dining area. So, we quickly glommed onto a booth with our own private TV screen and cheered for the Salukis. We got to see the complete second half & they won. This technology is pretty neat.
Following dinner we strolled to The Tattered Cover bookstore and I think everyone bought at least one book. I found Strunk & White's Elements of Style with illustrations and in hardbound (a great resource for us would-be writers).
Later, we got in touch with Dave and Burke Horner. We decided to meet for some drinks and Burke asked me to pick the place. I quickly consulted the GPS to see what was close to us and selected (drum roll please) The Sports Page Saloon, figuring it would be some sort of sports bar. Well ... we'll let the pictures tell part of the story:
Now I'm not sure what the "Pauz Inn" sign is all about but there was no sign announcing the Sports News Saloon. At least Burke was able to locate it. Actually, it looks much better in the pictures than in person. In person, it was a smoky somewhat run-down bar with a decided country-western flavor, lots of second-hand smoke and about 10 very sad-looking customers who were even sadder-sounding when they sang karaoke.
But it wasn't the venue -- it was the company!!
David and I had last seen each other several years ago while we were starting out on vacation and he & family were completing their vacation. We met accidentally at a, um, rest stop. While we were, uh, standing next to each other. Now normally "guy etiquette isn't to look either right or left but just ahead. I did glance right and lo and behold there was David!
This meeting, however, was much more conventional.
Burke and I hadn't seen each other in about 28.5 years ... I remember that Drew was 6 months old and we were visiting Dad and Ardyce during the summer while Burke, Sue and their family (at least Lisa and maybe Devon) were also visiting.
We had a great time although Burke may have bought a round of drinks (or more) for the bar when the waitress held his credit card hostage.
Saturday
That morning we paid a short visit to Ardyce and talked to her about the party for the next day. She seemed a bit tired (she'd had a number of visits from Burke, David, etc) but very excited about the party the next day.
That afternoon we visited Boulder (a few miles north and west of where we were staying and where Jim and Pam had taken us when we visited last summer. Walked around and bought a book or two plus took a drive up the Front Range into Nederland. I was a bit bothered by the altitude so I stayed in the car while Roy, Barb & Alec walked to the waterfall.
Here's a photo of Nederland and of the waterfall (neither of which I took but grabbed via the 'net).
Saturday night, all six brothers and families got together at a restaurant entitled "Chicago" and featuring Italian beef sandwiches, Jays Potato Chips and Green Rivers. Some non-Chicagoan infidels had gyros, bbq sandwiches etc but it was pretty authentic Chicago grub. Kudos to Bob and Jim who had scouted it out. And if any of us die of cholesterol-laden arteries, sue Burke who paid for the meal. (Thanks Burke!)
After dinner, we went to Bob and Judy's new home and watched a video that Jim had made with Ardyce. Ardyce described some of her family's history, how they got to Hastings NE, growing up in Hastings and her meeting Bill Horner. It was very interesting and Jim believes he has several other tapes for us to hear as well.
Sunday
The big day. We started it early and had breakfast with Jim and Pam and then went to their church (Cherry Creek Presbyterian). That is one large church! Made our church feel puny in comparison and Roy said his church is even smaller than ours. It was a great time to share with Jim and Pam and we appreciated their including us.
After church, Jim and Pam headed over to set up the party and we did a bit of sight-seeing in the neighborhoods around Denver. Denver is clearly a western city but there's some striking similarities with Minneapolis and St Paul as some of the housing was built in the same period as ours.
I'll upload pictures and give a description of the party in a separate entry ... it precedes this so you may have already seen it.
After the party, Roy, Alec Barb and I unwound with a glass of wine and then went back to downtown Denver.
We had dinner at Marlow's (I think I've been there every time when in Denver -- great food and great Manhattans) and spun memories. It's always great to see Roy and re-establish our connections. Poor Alec and Barb probably got bored just as they did last summer and again at Thanksgiving. But Roy and I find ourselves just, well, fascinating!!
Monday
Roy left for his 6:30 AM flight around 5:00 on the shuttle. Fortunately he demurred when I offered to drive him ... come to think of it, I didn't make the offer more than once and not very strongly at that. (Kind of like "well, I guess you wouldn't want me to drive you if I had to get up that early, right? Huh, right?")
We took off for Omaha. As we were driving, Barb idly said "gee, we're not that far from Hastings (Ardyce's home town)" Then she said, "gee, it would be nice to take some pictures of her old home there." Then she said, "you know, I don't think it's that far off the Interstate after all." I got the hint.
So, we started off and located Ardyce's old home: 1819 W 3rd Street, Hastings NE.
The siding has been updated and there's probably a few other updates but as you look up and down the street, it's not too hard to envision how it looked in the 1920s and 30s when Ardyce's family lived there. It's about six blocks from the business district and a block from a major east-west street where we suspect the buses ran that took Ardyce back and forth to the college.
So, it was off to the college to take some additional photos:
We finally straggled into Omaha around 7:30 at night. I was bushed, Barb was tired and Alec was all set to go swimming. (his one and only swimming event of the entire trip ... much to his chagrin)
Tuesday
Because we had made such a long drive on Monday, Tuesday was pretty easy. We left at a leisurely 10 AM and made it home before 5PM. In all, over 2100 miles and a lot of great memories.
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